Movie Review- Zodiac: Signs of the Apocalypse

Starring Joel Gretsch and Reilly Dolman (who?) as a father and son team that are forced into solving the cause of global disasters. Neil and Colin Martin are nearly killed by a freak meteor strike (while the dialogue plays up that both men are lonely and bad with women) and soon after are contacted by Kathryn Keen (Emily Holmes) who works for a private company with an interest in an artifact that she believes is causing the disasters. Neil is a professor and archaeologist who is illogically broke and jumps at the chance to help after Colin negotiates the fee up to $100,000.

zodiac

Neil and Colin make a series of preposterous Indiana Jones Lite finds, including rescuing Sophie (Andrea Brooks, star of the upcoming CW series “iZombie”) before Katherine reveals some questionable motives. The the Department Of Defense gets involved (one of the Agents is played by “Hemlock Grove” actor Aaron Douglas) and tries to shut down their science experiment/quest for adventure and salvation.

Neil discovers that the disasters all present themselves as Zodiac signs and they try to narrow down the upcoming dangers. The special effects are worse than Sharknado. Christopher Lloyd makes a cameo for no good reason. He doesn’t even say “Great Scott!”

There’s nothing remarkable about this film. There are pacing issues, fake science, bad effects, worse plot and an obvious ending. It’s like an Indiana Jones knock off for fans of Sharknado. There’s not much else to say about that. Andrea Brooks’ portrayal was the only highlight.

Couldn’t save this flop for me.

Part of my disdain may be that now when I here “apocalypse” that I expect ZOMBIES

1/5