Army of Darkness vs Hack/Slash #6

This series was wrought with delays, employed immature tropes and the last issue annoyed me to no end. But this was the last issue and I’d pressed on this long. So after Cassie betrayed Ash and left him in ancient Greece, what would become of her?

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Cassie takes on Britt Cilentro and heads back to the Ig’nant Mime Squad concert where overweight and underwashed teens had their sodas spiked and turned into Black Paladin stab happy dombies (that’s a demon-zombie, kids). This issue really tugged at my heart strings, Cassie is willing to cross time and space, fight deadites, cult leaders, suped up GI Joe wannabes and more to save Vlad from his fate. So she goes back to where Vlad died. But Ash, in a moment of maturity tells Cassie that he’s been down this road. But some other awful thing always happens. If she saves Vlad; what if she doesn’t marry Margaret and adopt Sandra? What if she has a whole different life that no one else remembers? 

And Cassie listens, and she doesn’t save Vlad. And she goes home with her wife and Ash babysits while they see the new Denzel movie. 

So I give Tim Seeley credit. Because he’d really lost me with #5. I was PISSED. Here’s the thing, though; it didn’t feel totally authentic until Ash asked Cassie to call him if she and Margaret ever wanted to make a reverse Oreo. 

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That’s Tim Seeley’s cover. None of that happened. But metaphorically it makes perfect sense.

Army of Darkness vs. Hack/Slash #3

It took super long for this to come out and then I waited a week and a half to pick it up. Was it worth the wait?

Yessir.

Issue three gets a new voice, that of Cassie Hack, serial killer killer. The final girl. 

The cult priestess is selling off the Necronomicon before Cassie and Ash come around.She sells it to a Mr. Raash, and offers him a deal -a huge discount in return for vanquishing “a skinny goth chick and a chinny pervert.” He accepts the deal and sets off with 3 deadly soldiers (and of course reads a page from the book of the dead to supe them up a bit.”

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Meanwhile, our heroes are socking it to mini-clones and what not. And we’re reminded why Cassie is along for the ride when she receives a call from her partner, Margaret, and baby Sandra. They go stay in a hotel and go to their separate rooms and not too long after they are attacked by the most “alive” seeming deadites yet. A woman who looks like a panther, a well armed man with a snake tongue AND the world’s only Arctic Ninja. 

Instead of getting their heads blown off, Cassie reads some pages from the book of the dead. -Now how that works without absolutely heinous repercussions? I don’t know.

It’s a fun issue and I like having Cassie as the narrator this time. Seeing her opinion of Ash their friendship was awesome (and there were some mini-clones pandering to those who think they should be more than friends), and Margret making an appearance to remind us that Cassie is doing this for her fam. Definitely the best one yet.

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Check out Variant Cover B (my personal fave) by Ben Templesmith, artist of 30 Days of Night. 

I’m really hoping the next issue of this doesn’t take as long to come out.

Army of Darkness vs. Hack/Slash #1

The debut starts out with Cassie Hack, the serial killer killer, having date-night with her girlfriend, Margaret. They left their baby Sandra home with a babysitter. Spilled wine reminds Cassie of the death of her friend, Vlad, and she asks to go home. But when they arrive at home Cassie spots an unknown vehicle up the street and suspects an intruder. She’s right, of course:

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A hilarious fight scene ensues, until they realize who the other is.

Turn’s out the fan’s of each other’s work (but who wouldn’t be?)

Ash is seeking the Book of the Dead (go figure), and has tracked it to Cassie Hack’s house (what are the odds). Then they realize that in all the excitement they haven’t seen the babysitter! Things never go well for babysitters. Kristin has been sacrificed and they find her eating her own hands.

With a battle cry of “Give me your skin!” A gory mess of a fight scene, ensues and then we get set up for another round of adventure with the two agreeing to come together as “a pair a’ rogue elephants united on a quest.”

A mash-up made in horror heaven! Badassery on all-sides.

T & A, one liners, interesting weapons of choice, reading in Bruce Campbell’s voice? Co-ed heroes saving each other’s skin in disgusting and unexpected ways?

Awesome! Too much fun!