Book Review #3- Turned by Morgan Rice

HAHAHAHAHAHA this book was awful.

I was on page 1 (technically page 7) when I realized I wouldn’t like this book. Now, I’m going to be honest… it’s YA… which I don’t typically read (because I typically don’t like it). So it is possible that this book never had a chance. As soon as I read, “At five foot five she wasn’t especially tall, and with her brown hair and brown eyes (and normal weight) she felt she was average. Certainly not beautiful, like some of the other girls.” I’m already rolling my eyes over here. Normal looking, conventionally pretty female has to compare herself to the “beautiful girls”. Now, plenty of girls feel like this in high school (I think, I mean, I was never “average looking”). But the author is not a teenage girl, this is written for teenage girls. Why are adults writing books for younger girls that feature characters that are mousy and boring? Why, oh why, are there so many dull ass characters? Why can we not start a trend where female protagonists wake up in the morning, go to school and say “I look fucking fantastic today.”?

Caitlin the only white person at her school. It’s urban, there are bars and cages on the windows and barbed wire on the fence around her school. …um, what? The author thinks this is what “New York public school” is. Someone calls a boy “Barack” as an insult. Everyone in the cafeteria is a racist stereotype. I don’t think the author has ever been to an urban area, let alone New York.

She almost gets mugged and suddenly has super strength. And she wants to bite their necks. Oh man, I feel some dumb vampire rules coming on.

Random WTF: The main character corrects her teacher, “You said ‘not acceptable.’ You meant ‘unacceptable.’”

I’m pretty certain either is accurate.

“Caitlin threw her head back and roared. She had transformed into a thing of fear.”’ umm… what?

She figured out she can throw people across the room but she’s scared to ride the subway.

Then she kills someone in an uncontrollable fit of hunger… and the press thinks it’s a serial killer (there’s only one murder this way… that’s not a serial) “This was the third murder this month, not counting the suicides.” …why would suicides count as murders? What?

Vampire rules: vampires are forbidden from publicly killing humans. They have mind control, are immortal, can catch bullets mid air… and they’re a big secret. Why? Vampires can mate with humans, the resulting children are mortal vampires and called half-breeds.

The first female Caitlin comes across is an instant enemy and Caitlin is extremely jealous of her. Caitlin is so upset that a 3,000 year old vampire didn’t fall madly in love after the first 12 minutes. And then moments later he admits he does have feelings for her! But it’s forbidden! She’s only a half-breed!

“She could feel the cop grab her tightly around one wrist, then the other, jerking her arms behind her too roughly, too high, using unnecessary force. How petty.” umm… you did kill someone.

The author seemed to be making up her vampire rules as she went along. Caitlin is …a moron. Terribly drab. Her brother ran away from home and she forgot all about him because… vampires and TRUE LOVE. There’s 8 of these books. 8. Terrible. The 2nd one takes place in Boston and judging by her shitty depiction of NYC and it’s inhabitants, I can think of nothing that would annoy me more. 

No stars- Avoid this like the plague.

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